My husband is impotent: what to do and how to live with him further? What to do if your man is impotent? My husband became impotent after my
Impotence worries not only the man, but also his wife. Problems in your sexual life should not be solved independently, but together with your partner. After all, it is the wife who is always ready to come to the rescue and do everything so that intimate life returns to normal. Many men do not believe in this and withdraw into themselves, preferring to remain in splendid isolation.
Who is an impotent person and how does he behave?
An impotent man is a man who is unable to have sexual intercourse due to erectile dysfunction. He may experience sexual desire, but his penis refuses to erect. Such men cannot satisfy women, and they themselves only receive negative emotions after futile attempts to make love. If an excited guy suffered a “defeat” once in bed and was under the influence of alcohol, he is not impotent. An impotent man does not have an erection with any partner for a long time.
For many women, sex life plays the most important role, as for men, and they are afraid to start a relationship with an impotent man. But there are also those for whom emotional intimacy plays the greatest role and they dream of building their life with an impotent man. This is not surprising - all people are different, and for some women the most important role is played by spiritual intimacy, not sex. Many men might argue with this, but the reality is that asexuality has been in fashion for a long time.
Women who do not plan to give up sex often wonder how to recognize an impotent man so as not to waste time on him. In fact, a man who has problems with erectile function is practically no different from others, unless his pathology is caused by an excess or deficiency of sex hormones. He behaves the same way as the rest of the stronger sex. The only difference may be that he will not hint at sex to you on the first date and try to get an unfamiliar girl into bed. He will be quite polite, gallant and calm. Perhaps a little anxiety and depression. But such men are also found among those who do not have any problems with potency.
Why does a man become impotent?
Psychological or physiological factors can lead to impotence. Physiological ones include:
- Diseases of the heart and blood vessels.
- Injuries.
- Inflammatory and infectious diseases of the pelvic organs.
- Diabetes.
- Hormonal imbalances.
- Thyroid dysfunction.
Men are very susceptible to bad habits. Smoking, drinking alcohol, poor diet and a sedentary lifestyle will sooner or later lead to impotence. The wife needs to reconsider her diet and add vegetables, fruits, nuts, legumes and lean meats to it.
They also become impotent after psychological trauma. It is enough to regularly tell a man that he is impotent, and he will become impotent. Unsuccessful sexual experience, constant dissatisfaction with a partner, stress, depression and much more can make a completely healthy man impotent.
What should a wife do if her husband is impotent?
Impotence is a treatable disease. You shouldn’t give in to panic, much less bring charges against a man. Men, when faced with erectile dysfunction, are even more upset than their wives. And, if your husband currently has problems with potency, this does not mean that he will be impotent for the rest of his life. No person is immune from illness, and think about how, in your opinion, a man whose wife was seriously ill should behave? Should we reproach her for this or even ridicule her?
My husband is impotent: what should I do?
- Intimate talk. If your husband is impotent, you should not worry and put pressure on the man. The wife needs to prove to the man that the lack of intimacy does not affect feelings in any way, that she will also love him, but she sees how bad he is and wants to help.
- Visit to a specialist. Men are afraid to visit doctors, especially urologists. What to do if you need to establish the cause of the disease? It is best if the woman herself finds the most suitable clinic and makes an appointment with her husband. To establish the causes of impotence, it will also be necessary to visit an endocrinologist, psychotherapist and sexologist.
- Belief in success. The relationship with your husband may worsen due to his worries. Inside, he has already decided to remain alone and believes that no woman will need him. After all, society repeats every day that a man cannot be impotent! In fact, all these are ploys for advertising impotence remedies, because more than 50% of men have problems with potency. Under no circumstances should you give in to your husband’s negative emotions and make sure that he takes the recommended medications.
At the moment, there are only a few diseases that cannot be cured - and impotence is not one of them. Men who are faced with this problem have every chance to make their sex life as bright and rich as before. In this case, the woman has an important role to play: to direct her husband to take active action - and in no case become depressed.
How to excite such a man? There are cases when an impotent husband turns out to be even a very hardy partner in terms of intimacy, but with another woman. If a man has a mistress with whom he often spends time, then impotence with his wife will only benefit him. A satisfied man will never go to a specialist and will not take potency enhancing drugs, citing their harm to the body. The only way to recognize a deceiver is by an internal erection or to determine the presence of a mistress using feminine tricks.
Very often the cause of impotence is psychological. An emotional impotent person does not have diseases of the internal organs or impaired blood circulation, but he does not have an erection. After all, at an important meeting, in transport, or when communicating with an unfamiliar woman, they do not get an erection. Being under the influence of irritating factors, men turn on self-preservation mode, and it is only a myth that a man should want everywhere and always.
If a man is in a state of stress, depression or anxiety disorder, then there can be no question of any sexual desires. Sometimes impotence appears due to failures in bed, when a man convinces himself that he cannot do it. In the future, he cannot relax in bed, thinking only about how to please a woman. If a man does not have any physiological disorders, then impotence can be cured in a short time using medications and psychotherapy.
You should know:
- Impotence is a treatable disease that is not a death sentence. Think about what you did wrong that you had to face this pathology? Maybe it's time to start leading a healthy lifestyle and quit smoking?
- If you don’t know how to live without sex, then think again about your behavior. Very soon you will be able to cure the disease, but for now you can enjoy the world around you and find your favorite hobby. Life is not only sex.
- Do you feel bad when your wife tries to excite you? Treat it like a game. It won't be a huge tragedy if things don't work out for you. Her overly sexual behavior is aimed at helping you. After all, no one except your significant other dreams of making love to you so much.
- If impotence is psychological in nature, then a man is able to overcome it himself. To do this, you need to carry out long-term work on yourself and remember where the problem of erectile dysfunction began. If you can’t put your feelings and nerves in order on your own, contact a psychotherapist, who will definitely help.
The danger of impotence should not be exaggerated. If you can't now, it doesn't mean your sex life is over. Perhaps this is a hint that you need to do something else that will bring even more pleasure.
How to avoid becoming impotent
- Avoid fatty, salty, smoked foods.
- Give up bad habits such as alcohol and smoking.
- Normalize your rest and sleep patterns.
- Exercise.
- Treat inflammatory diseases in a timely manner.
- Don't forget to strengthen your body with vitamins and minerals.
- Avoid stressful situations.
- Work on yourself and your emotions - try to get rid of the negativity inside.
- Believe in yourself and your success, then impotence will not be scary for you!
Unfortunately, in the modern world everything is not as simple as many would like. An impotent husband now is a full-fledged stigma, which is terrifying for both the man and the woman who lives with such a man.
And it’s very difficult to get rid of this, because it’s a kind of stigma. But you should understand that intimate life is called intimate for a reason - it is something that happens only between you.
So why is it so difficult to combat this problem?
Is the wife to blame?
However, before you consult a doctor, you need to think carefully and independently analyze the current situation, because the cause may not be physiological at all. There is a possibility that it is the wife who is the reason that the husband is impotent.
What should the wife do in this case? How can this even happen? It turns out that very often there are cases of partial psychological impotence, that is, the reason lies not in physiological, but in psychological problems, and the root of these problems is often the spouse herself.
She can criticize her husband, ridicule him, and criticism of his capabilities in bed has a particularly strong impact on him. There may also be a lack of spiritual intimacy, which deprives some men of the desire for physiological intimacy.
So the first thing you need to do is think about how you have behaved towards your spouse lately. Try changing your behavior, talking to him about your relationship, and so on.
However, this is only a special case, and it often happens that the reason is indeed physiological. So, your husband is impotent.
What should a wife do in such a situation?
Increased tone
Potency is also affected by the overall tone of the body, so your husband should go in for sports. Now there are a large number of gyms, and there is a high probability that his workplace already has one that he can visit for free.
Naturally, this is not the only option, and you can encourage him to go for a run in the evenings or just go for a walk with him. You can also give him a relaxing massage, and many experts recommend a contrast shower as a way to quickly and effectively increase body tone.
Aphrodisiacs
When a woman begins to say: “My husband has become impotent - what should I do?”, users often suggest using Viagra and other similar drugs. However, this is incorrect advice, since such drugs only temporarily increase blood flow to the penis, which does not provide a long-term beneficial effect.
You need to focus on products that are called aphrodisiacs. This means that they increase a person's sex drive, and if your husband constantly consumes such products, then his sexual function will not only return, but will become even better.
Most often, aphrodisiacs include a variety of seafood, from mussels to oysters. It is also recommended to consume citrus fruits and a variety of spices, known for their miraculous properties.
These include, for example, ginger, cloves and saffron.
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Impotence is a violation of male sexual function, the inability to perform sexual intercourse.
Two groups of reasons lead to problems with potency:
- Organic;
- psychological.
The former are less common. In 64% of cases, problems are associated with stress.
Sex determines a lot in relationships. This is not only a physiological need, but also an opportunity to manifest itself, to make a woman feel loved and unique.
If a man avoids physical intimacy, it seems strange to a woman. Behavior and appearance can give away an impotent person.
In this article we will give signs that can help identify a man with erectile dysfunction. Their combination should be alarming.
Lack of sexual desire
Erectile dysfunction makes itself felt not only in adulthood, but also from a young age.
Impotent people have weak erections. These are early signs of the disease. The penis is not hard enough even during sex. The manifestation of such signs is an organic disorder.
They avoid physical intimacy and do not talk about sex. They answer sensitive questions with restraint or change the topic.
Men who have problems with potency seem to be shy romantics.
Often behaves awkwardly. If behavior has not changed over time, a woman should think about it.
Ignoring hints about sex
- Phrases “ Plet's go see you“, “z go to dinner” are ignored or excuses are made.
- The man avoids privacy.
- Avoids kisses and intimate touches. Refuses to walk holding hands.
- Angry at frank conversations about intimacy.
Strange reaction to conversations about men's problems
A man doesn’t even want to hear about impotence. He gets offended by jokes and hints, even if he behaved normally before.
It is terribly unpleasant for a man to realize that he cannot please his chosen one.
Wrong lifestyle
Alcoholic drinks
They have a bad effect on the cardiovascular system, cause circulatory problems, which reduces libido.
Smoking
Constricts blood vessels, blood does not flow to the genitals.
Beer
Leads to obesity and reduced testosterone production.
Drugs
Lead to early impotence, deterioration of erection.
Junk food, too much sweets
Provokes hormonal imbalance and excess weight.
Praising yourself
Complexes and insecurities can hide behind self-praise. An impotent person behaves pompously, praising his own virtues. Convinced of his superiority. The problem is hidden behind vulgar hints addressed to women.
This behavior is less common because impotence often leads to decreased self-esteem.
Frequently asked questions and answers
What is the psychology of an impotent person?
In 80% of cases, the following signs become indicators of illness: irritability when attempting tactile contact, too modest or aggressive behavior for no apparent reason, no conversations, hints or mood indicating a desire for intimacy or privacy, dates have the nature of friendly gatherings in crowded places , sometimes there is too much love and care for pets.
Why does a man become impotent?
Impotence can be caused by a number of factors: impaired functioning of the reproductive system, various diseases of the prostate gland, lack of hormones, mental or physical stress, constant fear of getting sick, bad habits - smoking, alcoholism and drug addiction, side diseases of the body - diabetes, obesity, tuberculosis, anemia and others, an inactive lifestyle.
My boyfriend is impotent, what should I do?
First of all, you don’t need to overwhelm yourself with thoughts of “lost”, “fall out of love”, etc., as well as start putting pressure on a man, humiliating, interrogating, forcing him to have sexual intercourse when he is in a negative mood. It is better to gently and unobtrusively demonstrate emotional and tactile intimacy (support, praise, hugs), and persuade them to contact a specialist as early as possible, because there is nothing shameful in this. And during the treatment period, if the issue of intimacy is in the first place for you, you need to take the initiative and sometimes resort to the help of drugs that stimulate erection.
How to understand that you are impotent?
You should pay attention if you experience the following symptoms:
- you are less and less drawn to the woman you love and frequent joint pleasures with her;
- no erection in the morning;
- the penis quickly softens during intercourse;
- involuntary and rapid completion.
In order not to make fictitious diagnoses for yourself, in the first situation that causes your concern, consult a doctor and take the necessary tests.
What is the behavior of an impotent man in a relationship with a woman?
Characteristic behavior:
- too shy, blushes at the word “sex” and invites you for a cup of coffee in the morning in a crowded place, or vice versa - flashy behavior of a typical alpha male, constant vulgarity, indecent jokes and narcissism;
- inattention to women, but increased tenderness towards animals;
- hysterics and resentment over conversations on the topic of “male weakness.”
How to deal with an impotent man?
You need to take the situation into your own hands: change your routine environment and habits as much as possible, relaxing procedures, blocking stressful situations, and of course, activity and variety in your sex life. At this moment, a man must see that his problem is not ridiculed, and he is also needed: his partner is active, confident and relaxed, trying to surprise and experiment, but not aggressively, but sincerely and understandingly.
How do I know if I'm impotent or not?
You should not diagnose your disease based on a single failure or when factors such as stress, an unstable partner, fatigue, or uncomfortable conditions are present. Moreover, according to doctors, one should only begin to think about possible impotence when more than a quarter of all sexual intercourses have failed. In other cases, this is only a temporary decrease in sexual function, which is usually easily corrected. An accurate diagnosis can only be made by a specialist based on the examination.
At the very beginning of a relationship and married life, there is a great connection between partners in bed, a lot of emotions and great passion. Sex becomes an integral part of life and plays a big role in building mutual understanding and trust. Very often, after some time, this passion passes, and intimate moments become less and less. Their importance fades into the background.
Sometimes it happens that a man’s erectile function simply stops working under the influence of certain circumstances. Because of this, psychological barriers arise between partners. And an important question arises: what to do if the husband is impotent, how to live and deal with it?
The reason why the husband became impotent
In order to take any further actions, you first need to understand the cause-and-effect relationships. For what exact reason did your husband become impotent?
In general, doctors identify only two reasons: physiological and psychological.
Scientists believe that in most cases, men's impotence is influenced by psychological pressure from the circumstances surrounding them. Many factors can cause this: blockages at work or problems with its availability, quarrels in the family, death of loved ones, raising children, dissatisfaction with oneself, moving and much more. Thus, the psycho-emotional state of a man is undermined and this affects his sex life.
With a decrease in the number of sexual contacts, which become less frequent over the years, the partner’s self-esteem may fall. And, as we know, in order for a man to be passionate in bed, it is important that his libido level is always at its best.
But when everyday life begins to put pressure on family life, when work becomes more and more and in order to maintain financial income you need to climb the career ladder, then there can be no talk of any romance and constant bed pleasures.
Is it worth talking about the husband’s impotence if such an unpleasant incident happened only once? Of course not! The cause of this case may be excessive fatigue or illness (cold, flu). After all, he is also a human being. At some point, he may simply not want sex. It’s important to respond adequately to what happened and not show that you’re upset. Understand your man and support him without unnecessary pressure.
But when such cases become more frequent, there is already a reason to consult a doctor about this problem. Only he will be able to determine which category your husband’s impotence belongs to. If the real reason lies in physiology, then he may have any injuries to the genital organ, urethritis, hormonal imbalance, thyroid dysfunction, disruption of the endocrine system, prostatitis. So don’t hesitate to go to the clinic!
In addition to diseases, impotence can also be affected by various bad habits. This could be smoking or addiction to alcohol. So take it upon yourself, as a caring wife, to ensure that your husband tries to give up the harmful effects on his body.
How to behave and what to do if your husband is impotent?
If, nevertheless, you are already convinced that your husband is impotent, then you probably have a question: what to do next? Become an example for your own husband. Start taking care of yourself, going to the gym, eating right, doing exercises in the morning. In addition, do not show your man that your problems in bed are so great. This will only make him more gloomy and he will plunge into himself, begin to cheat and the situation will worsen. If you are positive, your husband will feel it.
Experts have long proven that husband and wife are a reflection of each other. When one of the partners tries to become better, the other begins to follow him.
So if you try to find other reasons to be happy and smile more often, you will notice a smile on your man’s face. His mood will noticeably improve. Do not forget about your own ingenuity and create comfort so that your husband enjoys being in your company and he always wants to return home as soon as possible.
What to do if the cause of impotence is a psychological condition?
In cases where a man’s impotence is affected by psychological dissonance, it is important to try to remain as calm as possible and not put pressure on him. Your home should become a refuge for your husband from all troubles and worries. If he has a busy time at work, then try to talk to him about it as little as possible and in your free moments distract him with more pleasant little things.
When serious conflicts arise between partners, it is possible that the man will withdraw into himself and stop wanting you. In the absence of mutual understanding and support between husband and wife, the desire to go to bed in the same bed very often disappears, and sex is the ultimate dream. Moreover, it is possible that your dreams are no longer with you at all. Nobody wants such results!
If any controversial situations arise, try not to make a scandal. Disassemble everything as calmly as possible, without raising your tone, shouting or breaking dishes. Any claims must be justified and explained: why you think that your point of view is correct. But this does not exclude the fact that you should listen to your husband’s opinion. Or maybe he's right too?
How to live with the knowledge that your husband is impotent?
Almost no one can answer your question about how to live further. Only you can draw certain conclusions and come to a decision. On one's own.
It’s definitely not worth blaming your husband for this problem and reproaching him for the current situation. Believe me, it’s not sweet for him either. To begin with, try to talk to him in a calm atmosphere, to build his trust. Offer your help, perhaps he will agree to accept it.
It is not uncommon for a sexual connection to develop after a frank conversation between a man and a woman. Talking to each other is an important piece of the family puzzle. If your spouse understands and feels that he can see his own support in your face, then this will be the key to further happiness.
But if talking doesn't help, then pay attention to yourself. Everyone knows that a woman’s appearance plays a big role. Perhaps you have stopped taking care of yourself and caring for yourself, you have gained a lot of weight, your hair has become dull and dry? Then take on your image, change something, go on a diet and love yourself. By the way, self-love is also not an unimportant moment. It is impossible not to want a woman who treats her body and organism with special attention and care.
Nutrition
The restoration of potency can also be influenced by diet. If your husband has high cholesterol or is overweight, then reconsider what you cook in the kitchen. It is very important that the food is healthy. It should include products such as nuts, honey, kefir, sour cream, various greens, vegetables and fruits, fish, poultry, bananas.
By reviewing your diet, you will notice that your husband's health will begin to improve noticeably. And if you combine all the tips, you will most likely achieve the most positive results.
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