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Statistics show that low libido is one of the most common problems in the intimate sphere.
Recently, a growing number of women who are faced with the problem of lack of sexual desire. Why don't you want sexual relations?

Why don't you want sex

Late in the evening, switching TV channels, sooner or later you come across an erotic scene in which a couple indulges in carnal pleasures with a fervor of passion. It excites and makes you think about. Why is everything in our life not as romantic as on the screen that excited our imagination?

Statistics show that low libido is one of the most common problems in the intimate sphere. Studying such a delicate problem, scientists have faced a lot of difficulties.

The fact is that women resort to any tricks in order to create the appearance of a happy sex life. Lack of desire sometimes does not affect the regularity of sexual relations. Sexologists distinguish three phases of sexual relationships - this is attraction,. The phase of attraction and arousal are related to the psychological state, and orgasm - to the physiological process. Excitation, bordering on this and that, is also expressed physically: the nipples harden, a tingling sensation is felt in the genital area (as a result of blood flow to them). But the desire phase is a product of our consciousness because we experience warm feelings, indulge in sexual dreams. It is impossible to experience passion without attraction. Sexual pleasure, from a biological point of view, is absolutely natural, just like the feeling of hunger.

Lack of hunger is an anomaly. Of course, every woman experiences a decline in sexuality, which can be caused by illness, stress, a recent pregnancy, and relationship problems with a partner. But if peace and mutual understanding reign in your tandem, there are no health problems, and why you don’t want a relationship, then the reasons may be as follows.

1. Wrong lifestyle

The most harmful factors in reducing the libido of a physiologically and emotionally healthy woman are lack of sleep, unhealthy diet and a hypodynamic lifestyle. Everything that is harmful to health also affects the emotional side of intimate life.

Solution. Take care of yourself and your body will feel a surge of sexuality!

Exercise, get at least eight hours of sleep a night, and eat healthy foods. Training is the easiest way to maintain the original freshness of sensations. They help our body maintain hormonal balance and metabolism, improve mood and enrich the sensations of sexual intercourse, as they strengthen the pelvic muscles and develop body flexibility.

If you suffer from constant fatigue, it is necessary to determine the reasons for this. To do this, you must undergo a complete medical examination and take a blood test for hemoglobin and blood sugar levels, to detect thyroid dysfunction and other chronic diseases.

2. Effect of drugs

Many drugs can cause sexual dysfunction. Usually, oral contraceptives cause this effect, especially in the first period of administration, until the body adapts to a new hormonal drug.

Sexual desire may decrease, but this side effect is not observed in everyone who uses birth control pills. The content of testosterone in the blood decreases, which directly affects all phases of intimate relationships. The same drugs have an antiandrogenic effect and slow down excessive hair growth. Antidepressants that regulate serotonin levels (Prozac, Lexapro, Paxil) can also reduce sexuality. Doctors say that the main consumers of this drug are women (65%).

Solution. See your doctor to consider changing your oral contraceptive. But antidepressants should not be canceled immediately. The first thing to do is to watch for side effects. After that, you can reduce the dose, change the medicine, or add some corrective drug to it.

3. Hormonal changes

The decrease in the level of estrogen, which occurs in the female body in the range of 30-45 years, affects all 3 stages of sexual life. Vaginal muscles lose elasticity, genitals secrete less lubrication. The lack of estrogen and testosterone is difficult to fill with a purely psychological desire. Hormonal drugs are one of the main obstacles to sexuality, so it is necessary to control their use.

Solution. You need to pass an analysis that determines the amount of sex hormones in the blood and thyroid hormones. The attending physician, based on the results of the tests, will refer you to a sexologist or endocrinologist who will prescribe the necessary treatment.

In such a case, local therapy is effective: vaginal suppositories and hormonal creams that improve lubrication and allow you to get more vivid pleasure from sex. An unhealthy lifestyle, hormonal fluctuations and diseases can block the path to love joys. And we do not know: “Why is everything not the way you want?”

In contact with

At the beginning of any relationship between two people, there is something that begins to elude over time - passion and desire. Family life is not only spiritual and physical intimacy. This is responsibility, raising children, caring for the elderly, distributing finances, and so on.

What was considered natural at the beginning of a relationship, for example, burning sex, sympathy for all the obvious and hidden shortcomings of each other, over time, to put it mildly, changes.

When the period of euphoric love ends, the couple is faced with situations that experience their true feelings. Dissatisfied partners seek connections on the side, get divorced.

For men, the topic of sex is very important in life. Everyone wants not only to have a wife, but also to see next to him the very personification of sensuality, passion, and constantly. But what if the beloved, once desired man, ceased to excite? Why don't you want to have sex with him? Or the end of passion - and the end of the relationship?!

A few important "whys" to understand

Physiology

Often, improper organization of sleep and rest, malnutrition and a sedentary lifestyle can be good reasons for not having sex. The combination of several, and often all of these reasons, affects the desire. The modern rhythm of life dictates its harsh conditions.

Psychology

A tired, stressed-out woman is tuned in more to regulating the balance in her head than to having sex. The inability or inability to fully relax seriously affects the appearance, look, real desires and feelings.

resentment

The sexual life of a woman and her perception of the world through emotions are closely related. If she is offended by her man, but no claims are made, and the question is not settled, the desire to make love will decrease and eventually disappear completely.

Temperament

It happens that partners have completely different temperaments. A woman with a low libido may well be satisfied with sex once a week, while a man is most often not impressed with this alignment. Moreover, at the beginning of a love relationship, wanting to impress, a woman showed great initiative.

Sometimes other than natural causes:

  • fatigue background,
  • stress,
  • the problem may be in the man himself.

Chop off the shoulder, breaking off relationships, jumping to conclusions about yourself or your loved one, letting destructive doubts into your head - these are delusions.

It is worth first of all to try to understand yourself, to sensibly analyze the current situation. If necessary, seek expert advice.

What to do? Beloved man does not excite!

Excite your sensuality. Use your own imagination, imagine yourself in an unusual setting, in underwear that you denied yourself, read books and watch films of a light erotic genre. Listen to your feelings.

What did you like the most?

Study your body, please yourself. Every day, catch yourself thinking that you are sexually attractive, take relaxing baths, fantasize.

If in your ideas you have a beloved man, and not an abstract image, then, most likely, both of you need to work a little on sexual relations. Perhaps your loved one has relaxed, does not pay due attention to foreplay, does not give compliments, does not care about his appearance.

You should definitely discuss the situation with your husband. When starting a conversation, do not get personal, because you are only trying to figure it out. And if there are problems in sexual life, then your loving man cannot ignore them.

Let him know what is important to you. Speak from the position of a strong desire to resolve the issue together, and not with the desire to prove your case. After starting a conversation with your spouse, analyze your grievances.

Think about it, are they serious, far-fetched or just related to PMS?

Perhaps the internal unresolved situations passed prevent you from wanting your loved one.

After weighing the arguments, decide which part of them is worth it to start debriefing.

Maybe your loved one has stopped worrying about their appearance, about the elements of hygiene, the absence of which makes you extremely depressing?

If you caught yourself thinking that something does not suit you in the appearance of your spouse, the fault is not nature, but the lack of discipline, say, but not reproachfully, but tactfully. At the same time, playing with one goal is dishonest, do not forget about self-discipline.

Consider the gym and swimming pool option. Take a bath together, give your favorite perfume, fragrant shower gel for no reason. Hygiene is a matter of habit.

Offer to visit an intimate goods store together. If you correctly presented your thoughts to your beloved, then he must correctly understand you and accept the offer.

Choose the attribute you like among the categories of intimate products together, it should be something that you will like equally. Undoubtedly, it will bring diversity and chic to your intimate life. Both of you need a change.

Sexual desire is not born with a click, it is a very subtle interaction.

Feeling that you cannot decide for yourself where your reluctance comes from, do not refuse the advice of professionals. If the partner is dear, and you don’t want to destroy the relationship, but sexual desire is at zero, only a specialist can extract the problem from the subconscious. It will also help resolve it.

Immersed in daily chores, giving most of herself to children, a woman often forgets about her nature. Attractiveness and sexuality is not only an external entourage, it is, first of all, an understanding of one's needs. A desirable woman is not a candy wrapper, it is a delicious filling. Feel like this. Mentally or on paper, formulate how sexually attractive you are, re-read, relax, love your body.

nivin.ru

What to do if you do not want to have sex with your husband?

Greetings, dear readers! The lack of desire to have sex with the man you love is not only a problem for older women. More and more young ladies are wondering where their libido is.

Libido is a passionate desire and attraction for a partner with whom a sexual relationship is brewing or already exists.

But this concept also has a broader meaning, in which libido is a psychic energy that prompts one to strive for some kind of activity.

It is believed that stress leads to low sexual desire in women, but is it really so? In today's post, I will tell you why you don't want to have sex with your husband and what methods work to increase female libido.

Enemies of the female libido

Everyone knows that men are attracted to beautiful women. The beauty of a woman says that she is a healthy female and with her you can get healthy offspring. Thus, the first enemy of female libido is lack of health. Following the basics of a healthy lifestyle leads to health.

Important! Every day, despite fatigue, poor health, depression, a quarrel with a husband or children, continue to follow the basics of a healthy lifestyle, namely:

  • Eat properly;
  • Move a lot;
  • Purify the body;
  • Dedicate 1-2 hours of time to your favorite business;
  • Protect yourself from the active sun, cold, electromagnetic radiation, chemicals in household products, hair dye, cosmetics and so on.

Dedicate a few months to sorting out all these issues, start with nutrition, it gives quick and tasty results, you will definitely want to learn the basics of a healthy lifestyle further.

Free download the book "Easy way to health"

And consider abandoning the use of any spirals and hormonal contraceptives in favor of quality condoms. Any interference with the work of hormones, as well as the installation of spirals itself, does not bring anything good to a woman's health. In addition to reduced libido, such unpleasant symptoms as hair loss, skin rashes, itching in the perineum, lack of sufficient lubrication during intercourse, and headaches can occur.

Since a condom also reduces the sensitivity of a woman, it will be good if you learn how to use the calendar method of preventing unwanted pregnancy. With a healthy cycle, it works great.

Enemy number two is the lack of intercourse. The less often a woman has sex, the less she wants it in the future. The sensitivity in the womb is greatly reduced due to its insufficient massaging by the male phallus. There is no blood flow, and there are no necessary hormones for the emergence of sexual desire.

You can not leave alone the near and far sections of the vagina. They need regular stimulation, even if the man is absent for some reason. There are many ways to play with yourself, there are also intimate toys for this, forget about judgments and use them for the benefit of health.

Sex is extremely important for mental and physical condition. Orgasmic women are very calm, cheerful, they have no tension and it is pleasant to have a relationship with them.

Enemy number three is the wrong attitude. It is necessary to prepare for intimacy long before the light turns off in the bedroom, and you lie down under the covers with your beloved. Sexual foreplay begins the moment you wake up in the morning. Stretch, do a set of exercises for intimate muscles.

Make sure that the whole morning was only yours. To do this, you need to wake up early. You can safely exercise, take a shower and clean yourself up. Then set the table for your beloved household. A tasty and healthy breakfast for the whole family is a very good start to the day and a manifestation of self-love.

To make the morning really sweet, you need to go to bed on time. Determine how much time you need to get good sleep. If you have small children, be sure to take the time to get the right hours during the day. All things can wait, the main thing is a healthy mother and wife. The woman in the family sets the rhythm, the lack of sleep takes her out of the rut, and this threatens with serious destruction of what has been created over the years.

Sexual foreplay should be maintained throughout the day. Kisses, hugs, winks, passionate texts...

Set aside the evening for even closer contact. To create an atmosphere of love and disconnect from the outside world, taking a bath for two, massage, subdued light in the bedroom and beautiful bedding, some berries and fruits for intimate enjoyment and pleasant music will help.

A woman warms up much more slowly than a man, so foreplay for her should be part of everyday life. Enjoying yourself beautiful, your body, feminine clothes, sexy lingerie - all this brings a slight excitement to a woman's life, which also contributes to the release of hormones of happiness.

And this is very interesting...

Wanting your husband is always and everywhere possible if there are no disagreements in the relationship. And if they are, but at the same time you consider your husband to be a wonderful, sexual partner, caring and responsible, then just pretend that you agree with everything at any showdown.

Let him speak out, let him feel that his word is the main thing, that he leads the relationship, for men this is so important.

Your time to persuade to your point of view comes 15 minutes after rough sex. It is noticed that a satisfied man largely agrees with his woman, use this until this fact has reached him.

Girls, if the article turned out to be useful for you, write reviews, you have the opportunity to do this anonymously. Keep my blog bookmarked so you can come back here again for useful information. All the best!

The course "Secrets of ideal wives" - was created by the founder of the center of sexual education Svetlana Kerimova, at the moment already known in many countries of the world. The course is unique in that it is suitable for women of all ages, married and unmarried. You can get acquainted with the program and find out all the details of basic family education here.

Sincerely, Nina Domnina.

female-magazine.net

The wife refuses to have sex with her husband. Is it possible to make her understand

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EVEN THE MONKEYS UNDERSTAND IT

To begin with, a scientific parable - in the subject, as they say. From the sex life of gorillas. Behind them - one male and five females - biologists have been watching for several years. And they noticed: some representatives of the weaker monkey sex often and persistently offer sex to the male, depicting an extreme degree of readiness. At the same time, the one who is already pregnant is the most active - she clings to her "husband" - the father of her unborn child. Why, one wonders, if the goal has already been achieved and the continuation of the family is ensured? And then, it turns out that the male is not distracted by other females. According to scientists, such behavior became a harbinger of monogamy in humans.

Salt of the parable: even monkeys understand that the male needs sex, that he strengthens the family. But some human females do not understand this.

"TIRED - HEAD HURT - WANT TO SLEEP"

“Sexless” is the term used by psychologists to designate a disgusting phenomenon that has struck both Western and Russian society. Namely, the lack of regular sexual intercourse between spouses. It happens, of course, that husbands also deprive their wives of intimate attention. But women are more often denied intimacy. And men, tormented by their libido, hear: "I'm tired - my head hurts - I want to sleep." Or quite offensive: “Where did you go ?!”

If a wife constantly refuses a man, and, mind you, a normal one, take my word for it, for no reason, then this humiliates a man, - someone Sasha, who wrote on the KP forum, expresses the most common emotion. He also offers a solution to the problem - also very popular:

I went to meet my wife. And relieved her of his desires for intimacy with her. She doesn't even have to come up with reasons to refuse now. I give my tenderness to the one who wants it.

And we have complete harmony, - Maria shares her experience. He doesn't want to, and I don't need to.

But what if the husband still loves his wife? If he is devoted and conscientious? He wants only her. Dreaming of real sexual harmony? Suffering. Tormented by guesswork. There are a lot of them, trust me. How to be here?

Psychologists have found the answer. But you won't believe how simple and straightforward it is.

YOU REJECTED ME THREE TIMES, THIS IS YOU

An amazing experiment was conducted by a sex therapist from Australia, Bettina Arndt. She asked 98 men and women (spouses) to keep anonymous diaries of their intimate lives for a year. And tell them the truth. Once she got what she wanted, the researcher wrote an entire book, Why Women Quit Sex and Other Bedroom Battles.

Reading other people's revelations, Bettina did not make a shocking discovery, discovering that there are many reasons. And they are usually different for everyone. But I did come across a few common ones.

First: most wives for some reason believe that sex should be only when, there and the way they want. But at the same time, they do not convey their thoughts to their husbands. And they just refuse. Like, he should understand. And he, the goat, does not understand. And climb. And offended even then.

In other words, wives make husbands guilty of untimely harassment. And they themselves are offended by them - such is the female logic. And this resentment, in turn, becomes a reason for refusal ...

The result is sexless that gets worse over time.

Second: the wife holds some kind of spite against her husband, even a very small one: for example, she didn’t take out the garbage, didn’t ask how she was at work, her mother-in-law said nasty things. And, pouting, "punishes" the deprivation of intimacy. But again, he doesn't tell the reason for the sex strike. They are silent as hell. Further - see above.

But even saying those very notorious “tired, my head hurts, I want to sleep,” many women omit the details. Or maybe they really had a hard day at work. And they are so preoccupied with her that there is not even a place in their head for thoughts about sex.

Conclusion: the bedroom is not a battlefield for psychics, and husbands are not quick-witted telepaths. They need to be explained in detail. And do not bring the matter to deep resentment.

DO NOT NEED ROMANCE, BETTER IMMEDIATELY IN BED

Mrs. Arndt herself was shocked by something else in her diaries. It turned out that all the common advice that psychologists love to give is no good. Add romance to a relationship, have a heart-to-heart talk, go to theaters and restaurants with your wife, send your children somewhere, visit a sex therapist, finally watch porn together ... All this is nonsense. Works only in very rare cases.

“I love my wife,” someone Igor writes to us on the forum, in fact, confirming the conclusion of the Australian researcher. - I want a wife all the time, although we have been together for 20 years. And she didn't tell me. And all the talk on this topic does not give anything. She doesn’t go to the doctor: “I’m not sick.” Physically healthy - porn turns on her, but knowing this, she doesn't allow her to turn it on. And nothing helps: we go on holidays, go to restaurants, and go to dances - romance is more than enough ... "

Bettina Arndt explains that passion, and even elementary lust, which pushes the newlyweds into each other's arms, cannot last forever. And even more so, it manifests itself equally in both spouses. Yes, even after many years. The production of the sex hormones responsible for it - passion - fades away in about 18 months.

The researcher has found the most primitive production enhancer - sex.

But how can one “treat” with sex, if it is just not there?! Very simple, says the researcher. I can't through. Through "tired - my head hurts - I want to sleep."

A woman must realize the perniciousness of sexless, understand how painful it is for a loving husband, destructive for a family. And do not refuse - always agree when the husband asks. Unless, of course, she had an attack of appendicitis.

By the way, Arndt learned from the diaries: there are a lot of women who, going to bed with their husbands, do not feel any sexual urges. But, suddenly succumbing to the pressure of touches, they suddenly feel that the corresponding excitement begins to rise. And the process ends up going well.

The secret of happy couples is that they just do it, says a stunned researcher from faraway Australia.

Maybe for Russia such a simple secret will do?

AND AT THIS TIME

The third is not superfluous if he is a hypnotist

Italians sexless brought almost to shamanism. Namely - to hypnosis, with the help of which they try to influence wives who have declared a sexual strike. According to the newspaper La Repubblica, 8 million people aged 18 to 65 have already applied to the services of hypnotists. And if she - the newspaper - is believed, then it helps many. And much faster than psychoanalysis.

In some mysterious way, hypnotists (for 10 sessions, 80 euros each) manage to awaken the former sexual disposition of the wives-refuseniks towards their husbands. So, somewhere in the subconscious, it still remains. And this is reassuring.

HIGH SCIENCE

And the pills won't hurt

It must be understood that the wife who has become ill with libido will be the first to refuse her husband. Gone. And this, perhaps, is the thick root of all problems. And one of the probable reasons for the loss - purely biological - was discovered by Katherine Esposito from the Second University of Naples (Second University of Naples).

The researcher knew that men with high cholesterol had lower libido. At least due to the fact that fatty plaques constrict blood vessels and interfere with normal blood flow to the genitals. Do women have similar problems? Ms. Esposito decided to check it out. Examined patients with normal and elevated cholesterol levels. And the harsh truth was revealed to her: in the latter, suffering from the so-called hypercholesterolemia, the ability to be sexually aroused was extremely reduced.

However, "abnormal", according to the researcher, can be treated. Medically. By means of drugs that block the work of the enzyme necessary for the production of cholesterol in the liver. A group of such substances is called statins. This is how they should be accepted. Naturally, after consulting with a doctor and making sure that the cholesterol level is really elevated.

www.spb.kp.ru

The wife does not want sex. Why?

  • Why a woman does not want sex
  • Tips for men and women

Women's sexuality…. How many articles and books have already been written and rewritten about her, how many scientific treatises have been created, but the sexuality of beautiful ladies, as it was, remains a mystery. More recently, her beloved was burning with fantastic passion, trying to do everything possible to kindle desire in a man. And now she is increasingly avoiding intimacy.

Either she has a headache, or she is wildly tired. Or maybe the critical days have come again, which, it seems, already happened last week. And if, nevertheless, the dear spouse can be persuaded to have sex, she behaves as if she is doing her husband a favor. “And what did I do that the wife does not want to have sex?” - the missus is perplexed, scratching his head thoughtfully, - “What am I guilty of?”.

Familiar situation? But how! Many women today, having married, begin to gradually forget what passion and orgasm are. They do not seek to focus on the sexual side of the relationship, they are quite satisfied with a calm, measured life with their spouse, without any "bed fun". Why does a woman not want sex? What is it - complacency, laziness, habit? Perhaps it is the environment that affects us so much that we lose the ability to enjoy sex and do not feel any desire to devote time to it? And what should a husband do then, whose wife, by hook or by crook, is trying to evade the performance of marital duties?

If you look at it, then this is not even so much a male problem as a female one. The lack of quality sex negatively affects both the physical and mental health of women, depriving them of the opportunity to relax. That is why these ladies have constant neuroses, which is the reason for the deterioration of family relations.

Because men simply do not understand why the beloved refuses such a pleasant activity and what to do in such situations. After all, they are always ready! Well, maybe not always, but a couple of times a week for sure. Blessed - never! But before she was so insatiable that it was time to hide herself ... What happened? Out of love? What are the secrets of female sexuality?

No. Not necessarily in love. The reasons for the sudden appearance of female coldness can be different. And the fact that wives do not want sex with their beloved husband is not always their spouse's fault. A woman can refuse intimacy due to various circumstances, the main of which we will now list.

Why does a woman not want sex?

  • Reason one. Fatigue

The most powerful factors that significantly reduce female sexuality are fatigue and lack of sleep. Exhausted by work, with nervous nerves, a lady who does not get enough sleep all week long can hardly be a good sexual partner. What does she think about when she comes home from work? About anything: about conflicts with colleagues, about what to cook for dinner, about how to quickly go to bed, finally. Not about sex, that's for sure. It is very difficult for a tired woman to psychologically adjust to a sexual wave, she constantly thinks about what needs to be done first and how to get out of this or that situation.

The husband, who is on fire with sexual desire and is able to forget at such moments about everything in the world, is not aware that his wife cannot do this. Male and female sexuality are different in their qualities. A husband can suddenly become ardent with desire and completely switch to him, but a woman also needs a psychological attitude, in the absence of which she will not receive any pleasure from sex with her husband. So the wife, tired and preoccupied with everyday problems, resists her husband who desires immediate caresses. Well, she cannot adequately respond to these caresses, she cannot! Unless it will lie like a log, if the faithful one is completely unbearable.

How many times have we been told that dieting should be done carefully and selectively! Some diets imply a violation of the hormonal balance, which, when fasting, must be supported by concomitant vitamins. However, we often do not bother to learn in detail how to adhere to a particular diet, and rush to destroy our extra (and not always extra) pounds in the way described in a fashion magazine or once used by a girlfriend. As a result, a fierce struggle with one's own weight turns into violence against the body, inflated nerves and a decrease in female sexuality to a minimum. And the frightened husband, perplexedly looking at his haggard and brutalized half of hunger, cannot understand why the wife stopped wanting sex. What kind of sex is there if she only imagines fried potatoes or cakes and chocolates, and the hormonal background continuously storms and throws from side to side!

  • Reason three. Pregnancy

A pregnant woman often neglects marital duties. And there are many explanations for this. First of all, future mothers seriously fear for the health of the baby, they feel a sense of responsibility for how the child will develop inside the womb. And in addition to fear for the well-being of the baby, a pregnant woman experiences a sense of embarrassment from the fact that she is doing “this” while the baby is in close proximity to intimate places. Suddenly the baby will feel something?

In fact, there is nothing to fear here. Pregnant does not mean sick, many of the joys of life continue to be available in this happy period of your life. If the pregnancy is proceeding normally, there is no threat of miscarriage, then nothing will prevent you from enjoying intimacy with your husband. Yes, and your baby will not feel any discomfort, as it is very securely protected in your tummy, and no “invasion” will harm him.

Many ladies are sure that a pregnant woman does not look sexy, that a big belly and weight gain will only push her husband away at the most crucial moment. But if your husband loves you, then he is proud of your “interesting” position and watches with excitement how your body changes. And, believe me, he cannot experience any contempt for your forms, simply because you are the mother of his unborn child. So stop doubting yourself and go to bed with your beloved husband. In the end, your good mood will benefit the baby.

  • Reason four. Passivity

Strange as it may sound, but the development of female sexuality significantly depends on how active a woman is in bed. And this activity is often suppressed due to the fact that the initiative in sex is always on the side of the partner. Surprisingly, this situation most often occurs when a woman marries the object of her dreams. We all dream of a real man who would solve problems for us, help in everything, take care and take care of us. It is so? Oh yes, it's just wonderful - to put the burden of responsibility for yourself on the shoulders of a strong man, and hide behind his back, like behind a stone wall! Wonderful. But over time, excessive guardianship on the part of a man makes a woman unable to act independently. She gets used to living according to her husband's instructions and does absolutely nothing without his instructions.

All this, on the one hand, is very good. You can relax, not answer for anything, decide nothing and do nothing to create a prosperous family. There is only one "but". Such a wife becomes a slave everywhere, including in sex. And this in no way can have a positive effect on the development of female sexuality, since constant passivity and dependence on the desires of the husband in the intimate sphere completely kills desire in the spouse. It is these women who most often cannot achieve orgasm. No, a woman who is absolutely passive and dependent on her husband, of course, will not refuse sex with her husband. But she will accept any kindness sluggishly, without excitement, without offering anything in return. And over time, her attitude to sex will turn into a boring duty that you don’t want to do at all.

  • Reason five. Lack of gymnastics

One of the necessary conditions for a high level of male and female sexuality is attention to one's own body. When we barely move around the house and office, growing fat and cultivating our laziness, when we hardly climb the stairs to the third floor, panting and swearing, all signs of female sexuality disappear without a trace. If a woman cannot cross her legs normally, what kind of passionate sex can we talk about? However, this applies not only to overweight, but also to thin women who do not bother to devote at least a little time to gymnastics.

Do you want to get bright, multiple orgasms with your husband? Then do not forget about your own health and the physical attractiveness of your body. Flabby muscles and vertebrae and joints crackling during movements do not at all contribute to the appearance of pronounced signs of female sexuality. Not every one of us has a natural grace that does not need to be maintained. The lack of physical activity completely destroys the flexibility of the body and the elasticity of the muscles, and we simply stop feeling our own body. So it takes revenge for the neglect of itself by the lack of pleasant sensations during sex with her husband.

The husband is trying with all his might to excite his wife, caressing her erogenous zones, and she giggles because she is tickled, or lies like a block of ice, completely unresponsive to caresses. And the husband no longer wants to know the amazing secret of female sexuality, because all his attempts are doomed to failure in advance.

  • Reason six. Rare Encounters

Oddly enough, but one of the reasons why women stop wanting sex is too rare intimate relationships with their husbands. On weekdays, work separates them, and two or three hours of evening meetings are filled with household chores. In their free time, everyone strives to do what they love: the husband goes fishing or fiddling with the car, the wife runs around the shops, salons or takes care of the children.

It would seem that this is a good situation in order to get bored, burn with a frantic desire and spend the whole night in each other's hot embraces. But, alas, alas! Yes, they always think about their soul mates, yes, they dream of making them happy with something, yes, they always talk about their family to colleagues, friends and acquaintances. But this is not enough! Because spouses are connected only mentally, and their bodies wean from each other. This is a kind of physical memory that is necessary for normal intimate relationships. And in order for the spouses to “remember” everything, it is necessary to have sex regularly. Otherwise, a woman does not get an orgasm at all, and a man’s discharge is fleeting and dull. Bottom line: wives do not want sex with their husband, because he does not bring them any pleasure.

  • Reason seven. Male forgetfulness

Another reason why wives stop wanting sex is the careless attitude of husbands to their requests to nail something, fix it, rearrange it, and so on. What do the faithful usually answer us if we irritably repeat our request again and again? Yes, they can’t think of anything better than to say, they say, I’m sorry, I forgot! And after a couple of minutes to forget again. Does it make us angry? Oh, how annoying! In addition, many women, having noticed obvious signs of “sclerosis” in their husband, decide that he is good for nothing. Today, they say, he forgot to nail the shelf, and tomorrow he will forget about the family altogether. And besides, for some reason he does not forget about sex!

And what kind of sex can there be if a woman remembers all the unfulfilled promises of her missus and is more and more inclined to think that sleeping with such a man means wasting time and energy for nothing? In the foundations of female sexuality, one of the dominant positions belongs to the instinct of procreation. But is it possible to continue the race from a lazy and "sclerotic" male representative? No, as a manufacturer, he seems to be nothing. But as a protector, earner and master in the house - this is a problem. However, what is the demand from a person suffering from constant memory lapses? None. So, there will be no sex either.

  • Reason eight. Coarseness

Long gone are the days when a woman could be subdued by simply hitting her on the head with something and dragging her into her cave. The times have gone, and the memory of them still controls the minds of some dorks, who only know what to wag their women's nerves, speaking in front of them exclusively in "New Albanian" and using the missus as a punching bag. If the wife of such a frame was brought up in the traditions of house building or grew up in a dysfunctional family, she can endure rudeness and beatings all her life. However, there is no longer any talk of her sexuality with her despot husband.

Every girl and woman expects tenderness and romance from intimate relationships, not every one of us can just “fuck” with a shameless spouse. After all, nothing destroys a woman's libido like psychological and physical violence. Unless it's intentional, consensual violence from couples who love silk whips and handcuffs in the bedroom. Well, there are actually very few of them.

  • Reason nine. Untidy appearance

Maybe for some of the men this will be a discovery, but what is, that is: women also love that the appearance of their life partners is pleasing to the eye. Well, a flabby, unshaven man rooted to the couch with a beer belly hanging over torn sweatpants doesn't look sexy, not sexy! Especially if there are examples of more athletic, well-groomed men before your eyes. How does it feel to come home from work, where all the male colleagues are dressed to the nines and smell of pleasant perfume, and on the couch of your own house to see a sweaty, untidy husband?

No, it is clear that at home the faithful should relax completely. But at least put on newer pants (they've been in the closet for two years!) and shave, brush your teeth and take a shower before going to bed, can he?! Laziness? Well, then let him not ask later why the wife does not want sex.

  • Reason ten. infantilism

It is believed that any woman has a strongly developed maternal instinct and this helps them get along with infantile husbands. But a spouse who is not able to make decisions on his own and depends on others in everything is unlikely to arouse sexual desire in his wife. No, well, what kind of a normal wife would burn with an unquenchable passion for a rag-husband who cannot take a single step without her instructions? At best, such a faithful will cause tenderness in her, at worst - neglect.

Needless to say, wives stop wanting sex with their husband-child pretty quickly? In order for a man to be sexually attractive to a woman, he must dominate her in some way. And if he continues to whine and shift the responsibility for making decisions onto the shoulders of his wife, then it will be impossible to perceive him as a sexual partner.

  • Reason eleven. Greed

Greedy men evoke even more negative feelings in women than infantile ones. The husband, who controls his wife's spending even in small things, constantly subjects her to humiliating interrogations, after which the poor thing does not even want to think about sex. This is not about male rationalism about money. We are talking about the pathological stinginess of the stronger sex, trying to save on everything, even on toilet paper. Of course, such mean people will complain that the wife does not want sex! Offended by the reproaches of the spouse, the nervous woman is not up to intimacy. She would go through the insult, but put her nerves in order!

Well, here, perhaps, are all the main reasons for the extinction of female sexuality in marriage. Undoubtedly, there are also many other reasons, but they are not as common as those that we talked about above. So how can you fix the situation in cases where the wife does not want sex and refuses to share a bed with her husband?

What to do if the wife stopped wanting sex? If a couple of years ago you made love almost every day, and now the wife has stopped responding to her husband's hints about intimacy, then you need to urgently take action. Which? Let's talk about this separately.

  • Eliminate the possibility of overwork and sleep well;
  • Learn to forget daily problems and switch to intimacy;
  • Pamper yourself with delicious food and other pleasures more often;
  • Do gymnastics regularly and train your body;
  • Try to be as active as possible in bed;
  • Spend as much time as possible with your husband.
  • Be attentive to your spouse;
  • Do not allow rough treatment of your wife in everyday life;
  • Help your wife with housework;
  • Give her the opportunity to take initiative in any matters;
  • Take responsibility for making decisions on many family problems;
  • Do not count a penny in the costs of your spouse;
  • Look after yourself.

These are simple tips, but for some reason we very rarely follow them and do not want to do anything that would help correct the situation .. And as a result, after five years of family life, we begin to forget what first-class sex is, thereby depriving ourselves of one of the biggest pleasures.

The fact that the wife stopped wanting sex is a problem not only for her husband, but also for herself. Is this state of affairs good? Of course not! So let's appreciate our sexuality and enjoy it!

The doctor whose visit instills fear in most Russian parents is a neurologist. Moms and dads are afraid that this particular specialist will definitely find some kind of neurological abnormality in their beloved child. And these fears are not so groundless - according to statistics, 90% of babies in our country have one or another neurological diagnosis. Whether this diagnosis is always reliable and whether neurological problems are actually so common, the well-known pediatrician Yevgeny Komarovsky tells parents.

Features of the children's nervous system

The nervous system of a newborn undergoes the most significant changes in the process of growth. Children are born with an immature nervous system, and it has yet to be formed, strengthened. The most intense changes occur during the neonatal period and the first year of life, and therefore it will not be difficult for any neurologist to find certain neurological symptoms in a baby at 2 months or at 6 months.

During the period of the formation of the functions of the nervous system, not everything goes smoothly, says Yevgeny Komarovsky, hence the incomprehensible cry for an incomprehensible reason, spasms and tics, hiccups and regurgitation, which bring so many experiences to parents and rich food for the activities of doctors.

If mothers understand the seriousness of the processes taking place with the child, questions, fears and doubts will become much less.

The brain of a newborn is quite large compared to the body, as the child grows, the proportions change, the structure of the brain becomes more complicated, and additional furrows appear.

The most active changes occur from birth to 5 months.

The spinal cord and spine of the baby grow unevenly, and their growth evens out at its pace only by 5-6 years. The speed of transmission of nerve impulses in the nervous system of a child is different than that of an adult, and in accordance with mother's and father's, it will come only by 6-8 years.

Some of the reflexes that a newborn has, go away with time and by the year there is no trace of them, they are replaced by permanent reflexes. The sense organs in newborns function from the first minutes after birth, but not in the same way as in adults. For example, a baby begins to see clearly at about 1.5-2 months, and he can hear well already on the third day after birth.

neurological problems

When mothers with complaints of a child's trembling chin, shaking hands or regular hiccups come to the doctor, he understands perfectly well that in 99% of cases such symptoms are a variant of the norm, given the intensive process of improving the nervous system. The doctor knows that these little "troubles" will most likely go away on their own, and possibly very soon. But he, according to Komarovsky, does not want to take responsibility for your child, and therefore it is easier for him to say that the shaking chin is a neurological symptom, and prescribe a certain treatment that will not cause harm (massage, swimming in an inflatable circle on the neck, vitamins).

Of course, there are real neurological problems, and they are all very serious without exception, Komarovsky says, but they occur in only 4% of children.

Therefore, most of the neurological diagnoses made by neurologists in the clinic for the next scheduled examination of babies have little in common with real diseases.

Worst of all, if the doctor prescribes medication to the child to eliminate neurological symptoms, which by and large exist only on paper.

Real situations when such pills are needed - no more than 2-3% of all established diagnoses. But they are accepted by everyone to whom they are prescribed.

Komarovsky considers effective drug treatment only for children of the first month of life, if they really have serious violations during childbirth. Then even they are shown only massage and physiotherapy.

When does the problem really exist?

- a diagnosis that is very fond of making children in Russian clinics. When it really is, the child needs urgent hospitalization, and not home treatment with pills, says Komarovsky. If the child is cheerful, cheerful, active, sociable, he does not need to be treated for intracranial pressure, since it is most likely not present at all.

The most common complaint with which parents turn to a pediatric neurologist is the child's op.

With this, in most cases, the search for a disease begins, which, most likely, will be found.

Komarovsky urges mothers to stop looking for diseases in their children and simply understand that a child has a lot of other reasons for crying - hunger, heat, a desire to communicate, a desire to attract attention, an uncomfortable diaper, and so on. All these reasons have nothing to do with neurological diseases.

Very active children are considered to be sick, they are immediately diagnosed with "hyperactivity", calm and slow children are also considered unhealthy, they are stigmatized as "lethargy", they try to explain poor sleep and appetite with neurological problems. You don’t need to do this, says Yevgeny Komarovsky, since real neurological diseases are rare, and they sound menacing, probiotics and gymnastics do not cure them.

These include epilepsy, cerebral palsy, neurosis of varying severity, Parkinson's disease, encephalopathy, pathological involuntary nervous tics and other conditions, many of which are congenital.

There is no need to compare your child with other children and the norms of the development of babies that exist in theory. Your child is a personality that develops in accordance with its internal "settings", they are purely individual.

The best prevention, and at the same time the treatment of neurological alleged "problems" that exist only on the doctor's paper and in the minds of restless mothers and grandmothers, is the correct way of life for a child.

Long and regular walks, bathing, hardening, reasonable nutrition (without overfeeding), a daily routine that is convenient for mother and child, which is strictly observed, strengthening massage every day, will help to cope with hyperactivity, and with a trembling chin, and sleep disorders in a child.

Avoid overdosing on calcium and vitamin D, as these conditions can indeed cause certain problems with the nervous system. This should be discussed in more detail with the attending pediatrician, who will determine the necessary dosages for your particular child, taking into account the age, weight and health of the baby.

You will learn more about Dr. Komarovsky's opinion on neurological problems in children from the following video.

Sleep problems, decreased muscle tone, and frequent crying sometimes indicate a disorder in the functioning of the nervous system. The sooner the neurology and its cause are identified, the greater the chances for a quick recovery and proper development.

Neurology of children under one year old - reasons

Neurological disorders in children are associated with damage to the brain and spinal cord, cerebellum and peripheral nerves. Malfunction of the nervous system can be congenital, when pregnancy was accompanied by complications or the child was born with genetic defects laid down at the beginning of embryonic development. Acquired after birth disorders are observed with malnutrition, after injuries and a serious manifestation of allergies.

The most common causes of cerebral palsy are associated with the prenatal period, these are premature and difficult births, fetal infections, and genetic problems. Epilepsy is often the result of trauma, infections, tumors, brain damage. Another cause of epilepsy is systemic disorders such as hypoglycemia or hyperglycemia, uremic syndrome, chemical poisoning, and the result of an increase in body temperature above 39 degrees.

Experts are still looking for an answer to the question why the same factors act differently on different children - some babies are born healthy, while others have pathologies of varying severity. This is probably due to the characteristics of a small organism and its sensitivity.

Symptoms of neurology in children under one year old are not always a cause for concern. If such signs as crying and insomnia are temporary, then this is a variant of the norm - modern crumbs often react with capriciousness to weather changes or an excessive amount of impressions. Tremor (trembling of the hands) disappears after the third month of life, in premature babies after 4-5 months. The size of the fontanel and its closure may deviate slightly from the norm, provided that the growth of the head is correct and there are no other developmental complications.

Startle in sleep is not always a pathology, it is normal for any age, if they are not observed during the entire period of sleep. Starting while urinating is not a reason to visit the doctor in the first year of the crumbs. Increased muscle tone (hypertonicity) in newborns returns to normal at the 5th month of life (the maximum allowable period).

When to go to the doctor

A scheduled visit to a neurologist is mandatory in the first, third, sixth and twelfth months. During the examination, the specialist can voice complaints and ask questions. The neurologist will examine the child for disorders and give recommendations regarding treatment and try to find the causes that caused the disease (if any). Consultation is needed as soon as possible when the following symptoms are observed:

  • While crying, the child throws his head back.
  • Congenital ones do not fade away six months after birth.
  • The baby does not respond to bright lights or the noise of a rattle.
  • Does not hold head after first thirty days of life.
  • Saliva is profusely secreted after feeding.
  • There are difficulties in feeding, the baby cannot swallow food.
  • Increased anxiety, no need for sleep.
  • The baby does not hold the rattle 30 days after birth.
  • He loses consciousness, convulsions or temporary "off" consciousness (absences) are observed.
  • Falls into the head of the fontanel.
  • Often cries, has difficulty falling asleep.
  • Does not imitate the speech of adults after the third month of life.
  • Does not like to lie on his stomach (a typical sign of children with neurological disorders).
  • Does not cry, passive behavior, sleep takes more than 20 hours a day.
  • It is difficult to change clothes due to strong muscle tension.
  • The baby constantly arches the body or tilts its head to the side.

If neurology in children under one year old is not treated against the recommendations of a doctor or was not noticed, at an older age this will lead to speech delay, inability to concentrate, learn and control behavior. The most “harmless” result is headaches and emotional instability.

Rehabilitation

If developmental disorders are detected, the neurologist sends for additional examinations and consultations with other specialists, for example, an otolaryngologist and an ophthalmologist, in order to find out the causes and choose the right treatment. Therapeutic methods vary depending on the diagnosis, usually a course of massage and medication is prescribed to restore the functioning of the nervous system.

It is important to start the course of restoration of hearing and vision as early as possible, preferably before the first six months of life. After the first year, treatment no longer gives such positive results, and neurology progresses faster, which leads to disability. In severe cases of disorders of nervous and mental functions, treatment is aimed at improving the current condition.

It is extremely important during treatment to observe proper nutrition of the child, if the mother is breastfeeding, it is necessary to choose only natural products, avoiding ready-made meals with the addition of artificial flavors and flavor enhancers. Also during breastfeeding, you can use additional sources of minerals and vitamins (dietary supplements). Omega-3 supplements have a positive effect on brain development and the nervous system.

In addition to a healthy diet, neurology in children under one year of age requires stimulation of development in various ways - for example, reading fairy tales and walking in the fresh air, encouraging physical activity. These simple steps have a positive effect on mental abilities and help the body cope with all disorders and their causes.

Pediatric neurologist (neuropathologist)

The most common pathologies of the central nervous system in children under one year old include the so-called perinatal encephalopathy. The identification of deviations and pathologies of the nervous system of the child is engaged in pediatric neurologist (neurologist). The development of perinatal encephalopathy in an infant can provoke an entanglement of the fetal neck with the umbilical cord during pregnancy, premature from the placental layer, prolonged or premature birth, general anesthesia during childbirth. Many pathologies of the child's nervous system are associated with brain hypoxia, which has arisen due to external or internal adverse factors in the last month of pregnancy - toxicosis, the use of potent drugs, smoking, the development of acute infectious diseases, the threat of miscarriage, etc.

Various pathologies of the central and peripheral nervous system of the child must be taken seriously. Timely contacting to a pediatric neurologist at the slightest sign of a violation of the nervous system in a child, severe consequences in development can be avoided. If a pediatric neurologist does not diagnose and prescribe a course of treatment for a child with certain disorders of the nervous system in time, then inaction can lead at least to a delay in the speech and psychomotor apparatus. Pathologies of the nervous system can also lead to attention deficit disorder, behavioral disorders, emotional instability, and impaired formation of reading, writing, and numeracy skills.

Pediatric neurologist must necessarily examine the child when the first signs of a pathology of the nervous system appear, which include the following symptoms (may appear immediately after birth or several months later):
1. The arms and chin are shaking strongly at the slightest excitement, crying, and even sometimes in a calm state;
2. Very superficial, restless sleep in an infant. The baby has difficulty falling asleep and often wakes up;
3. Frequent and profuse regurgitation in an infant;
4. Convulsions (twitching) during an increase in body temperature;
5. When relying on the foot or on the "toes", the fingers are strongly pressed

As noted pediatric neuropathologists, severe lesions of the nervous system are easily diagnosed and are much less common than the lungs (especially in the first year after the birth of a child). Small pathologies of the nervous system are much more difficult to diagnose, but it is the early detection of disorders of the central or peripheral nervous system and the subsequent complex of treatment that make it possible to avoid the dangerous consequences of perinatal damage to the child's brain. It is extremely important that during the first few weeks after birth, the child is examined by a specialist - pediatric neurologist.

According to recent statistics, more than 50% of childhood disability is associated precisely with pathologies of the nervous system, 70% of which appear during pregnancy and in the first month after the birth of a child (perinatal period). Pathologies of the nervous system in the perinatal period cause the development of perinatal encephalopathy, a syndrome of minimal brain dysfunction (more recently referred to as ADHD). Untimely treatment of these disorders of the nervous system can lead to excessive irritability, impulsiveness of the child, poor school performance. Later, lesions of the central and peripheral nervous system can lead to various diseases of the musculoskeletal system, motor awkwardness, severe headaches, autonomic dysfunction syndrome.

During the inspection, pediatric neurologist collects the developmental features and past illnesses of the child from the moment of birth. The specialist also analyzes information about how the last weeks of pregnancy went, how the birth went, what diseases the mother suffered in the last month of pregnancy. If any signs and symptoms of a nervous system disorder in a child are detected, a pediatric neurologist prescribes additional studies - ultrasound (NSG), fundus examination, EEG, ultrasound (Doppler), stem auditory evoked potentials technique, MRI (in rare cases). After analyzing the results of the studies, the neuropathologist prescribes and controls a specific treatment.

In the first month of a child's life, intensive maturation and development of brain structures, mental and motor functions takes place. The sooner the pathology of the nervous system is detected and the appropriate course of treatment is prescribed, the higher the likelihood of avoiding dangerous consequences for the health of the child. Today in the arsenal pediatric neurologist There are many different methods of treatment for both severe and mild pathologies of the nervous system. These are physical methods of influence (physiotherapy exercises for children, massage, physiotherapy), and drugs with studied clinical efficacy, and the latest methods of neurological rehabilitation (specialized computer speech programs, methods for improving cerebellar stimulation).

Many modern medical centers are equipped with the latest equipment for diagnosing diseases of the nervous system, develop and apply effective techniques of manual and emotional therapy in order to avoid the use of chemotherapy drugs that have side effects as much as possible.
Here are some techniques that manual therapists and pediatric osteopaths use to treat pathologies of the nervous system in children:
1. Visceral manual therapy.
Restoration of mobility and normal functioning of organs.
2. Vertebroneurology (soft technique of pediatric manual therapy).
This technique is based on working with ligaments and muscles at a slow pace with stretching of spasmodic, tense areas.
3. Craniosacral therapy. Normalization, alignment of the work of the bones of the child's skull.
When the movement of the bones of the skull is displaced or disturbed, the movement of the cerebral fluid, blood flow is disturbed and, as a result, the functioning of the brain worsens, intracranial pressure increases, the ventricles of the brain expand (hydrocereus), and headaches intensify. This technique is very relevant for young children.
4. Emotional techniques.
Very relevant for behavioral disorders, various neuroses in children. Emotional techniques are associated with the impact on the channel-meridian and stress points, with the emotional state.
5. Work with muscles for their relaxation.
As you know, muscles are associated with internal organs, bones, vertebrae. The technique is aimed at muscular-ligamentous relaxation, post-isometric relaxation (holding a special posture, and then relaxing)

Pediatric neurologist also deals with the diagnosis and treatment of traumatic and infectious lesions of the nervous system, tumors, cerebral palsy, diseases of the autonomic nervous system, convulsive conditions (for example, epilepsy in children), chromosomal and hereditary diseases of the nervous system, related to nervous diseases (endocrinological, orthopedic, psychiatric disease).

At an older age to a pediatric neurologist should be treated for the following symptoms:
1. Frequent headache
2. Piercing back pain
3. Problems of memory and attention
4. Violations of the functions of the spine at different levels
5. Reduced concentration
6. Panic attacks
7. Delay in the rate of speech development, writing, sound pronunciation
8. Diseases of peripheral nerves (neuropathy, neuralgia)
9. Quick fatigue

Scheduled examination of the child at a pediatric neurologist:
At three months
At six months
At nine months
At 1 year old
After a year - mandatory annual examination by a neurologist.

There are the following children's neurological lesions:
1. Due to toxic disorders
2. Hereditary, genetic
3. Infectious
4. Hypoxic lesions
5. Due to traumatic lesions
6. Epilepsy (post-traumatic and hereditary)
7. Specific syndromes (including combinations of the above lesions of the nervous system)