A funny short poem about work. Cool poems about work

Work takes up a huge amount of time in our lives, and it is not surprising that there are many poems about work. And the fact that many people actually work only part of the time that they are at work is the reason that funny poems about work began to appear, in which the authors expressed and played out all aspects of work activity. In our section we have collected some of the funniest poems about work and we hope you enjoy them.

I’m sitting in my office in a damp warehouse,
Tired dirty faces all around.
The shelves are bristling with various irons -
They have spare parts like pine cones on a Christmas tree.

The passages wind like animal paths,
Dirty movers walk around in droves.
They jump on the shelves like monkeys
Laziness of the day warehouse boys.

Some people don't really want to work,
Someone seems to have been bitten in the ass,
Briskly scurries through the labyrinths of the warehouse.
The warehouse manager walks like an important bear...

There are hyenas, jackals and wolves here -
I hide cowardly behind the distant shelves.
To our kettle for coffee
Everyone comes running together early sometimes.

And how to go to the zoo every day for work
Dreaming of living until next Saturday...

I'm looking for a job. I need it without sweating
To the car right under the gate
So that you don't want to go out
In addition, at work so that there is

Furnishings from the best fashion designers
I still want to, even though it’s not clever
Two cute obedient secretaries
Running on command: "March bunnies!"

Torment the keyboard with your fingers
Catching what I wanted to say.
From the windows the direction is towards dawn
My worker would have an office.

And a sauna with a huge jacuzzi
For erotic and fiery discussions.
Yes, not fill with water, but with wine...
Steamed lobsters in milk

I’ll start creating impromptu and reviews
It's a pity there is no license for such work.

I agree - and don’t pay in the future,
Let him stagger me as I go,
Don't give me shelter, don't feed me,
I'll still come to work.

Pay day - no mourning date,
It's just not there this year
Don't give rations and wages,
I'll still come to work.

I will never go on vacation,
I meant this sea
Empty tea and crackers for lunch,
I'll still come to work.

And I don’t need treatment at all,
They can cure you suddenly, unfortunately,
No rewards needed
I'll still come to work.

Nothing like patched clothes
I'm not lying to you, keep in mind
Even if the travel is paid,
I'll still come to work.

I will come even if there is an eclipse
Even if the boss is Judas,
Even if the brain is cloudy,
I WILL COME! BUT I WILL NOT WORK!!!

In many cases and in many workplaces you cannot do without humor, so in this section you will find exactly what you need - cool and funny poems about work. If suddenly your boss or another “stupid” client makes you depressed or pesters you with crazy ideas, read cool and funny poems about work and cheer up. We know how difficult it can be to stay cool and calm in the workplace, especially when you're dealing with clients who don't understand the issue. It is for relaxation and calm that we have collected funny and cool poems about work. We hope that they will help you in your difficult work.

Every business has a special smell.
The bakery smells of burnt baked goods.
The butcher smells like rotten meat.
The stove smells like carbon dioxide.

The milk jug smells like sour cream.
The miners smell of burnt methane.
Newsboy smells like a dead duck
Like a perfume department - a prostitute.

The surgeon smells like unsuccessful anesthesia.
The milkmaid smells like evening manure.
The furrier smells of flayed skin.
Vacuum cleaner... You know how.

The cook smells of sour cabbage.
The nurse smells like an enema.
The amateur fisherman smells like dynamite.
The tourist smells of sprat in the tomato,

Iodine with brilliant green - mountaineering athlete.
The radio operator smells like Morse code.
And the heroin smuggler.
The sailor smells like spilled oil.

Only the deputies do not smell at all.
Mothers-in-law usually smell like pancakes,
Everything at customs costs a lot of money.
The party smells like red flags.

Nanny smells like Huggy's diaper.
The shoemaker smells like thick shoe polish,
And the tailor smells of mothballs.
The carpenter smells slightly like turpentine,

And the guard on the corner is on fumes.
Smells pharmacy kiosk aspirin,
And the popular singer uses cocaine.
The English consul smells like oatmeal,

The school teacher reeks of valerian.
It smells like a stale soldier's boot.
Smells like a hot iron, bro.

I love work, I love salary!
I catch myself doing this more and more.
I love the Boss too; he is better than others!
And Boss Boss and everyone else.

I love my Office and its location
And I feel disgusted with vacation.
I love my furniture, damp and gray,
Pieces of paper in which I believe in God!

I love my chair in the Cell without light
And there is no more beloved object in the world!
I love my equals too
Their cunning glances, ridicule, mockery.

My glorious Display and Computer I personally
I kiss you furtively, even though they don't care...
And every prog again and again,
I struggle to understand from time to time!!

I'm happy to be here; and haven't weakened yet
Favorite work, the happiest slave.
I love standards and deadlines for work,
I love meetings, even though I fall asleep there.

I love Work - I’ll say it without pretense;
And these smart people, all in white,
Those who came to visit me today,
With the desire to place me somewhere!!

I'm coming back on payday
Collapsed on the bed
You gently took off my shoes,
I started kissing you on the cheek

From the blow of fumes
I just winced slightly,
Quickly took it out of the bar
Two bottles of cognac

I rushed to cognac,
You rushed to the jacket
And there’s not a damn thing in your pocket,
Boo-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga!

Evil everyday life rolls on.
And may luck not be with me,
IT WILL BE FRIDAY,
And no one will take it away.

The TV diligently lies to me,
Only one calendar will not lie:
IT WILL BE FRIDAY FOR SURE
And no one will take it away.

I'll prick a cucumber on a fork
And on the table, as if on a pedestal,
I place a bottle like a statue
Wonderful company "Crystal".

And let them tell me that I'm a drunkard,
And let them talk other nonsense,
IT WILL BE FRIDAY
In defiance of all bosses!

You warm your hands on someone else’s misfortune,
I can’t stop your appetite...
You can take EVERYTHING from us,
ONLY YOU CAN'T TAKE AWAY FRIDAY!

Stay at work
And play digger all night
And, looking at you, the customer
The deadline will be postponed.

If your favorite kettle
The tee has no socket,
That's for this crime
We must strictly punish

And with an unwavering hand
Unplug the server from the socket,
So that everyone around you will know
It's time to drink tea.

If suddenly your car
Doesn't work as it should
You're on the motherboard
Hit your fist hard.

If it doesn't help, hit it with a sledgehammer,
Kick the monitor...
You will then explain to your superiors:
"She started it first!"

If suddenly on your hard drive
An evil virus has leaked
Don't treat him with Lozinsky;
The virus also wants to live!

Infected programs
Scatter it on BBS's,
And you, your colleagues
Will be remembered often.

If your colleagues
They gave me a big bonus
And they completely forgot about you
And they didn’t give any

Instead of paint, pour it into the printer
Strawberry jam,
And about you in the institution
They will never forget!

I feel bad on Monday, just terrible!
The worst day of the whole week.
Like a snake, I make jokes through my teeth,
And all the thoughts in my head are askew.

Birds fly above me,
Bugs and bugs are buzzing around...
Wow! Shoo, - I'll take you! Sparrows, titmice!
And the kids are running around and screaming!

No need to go to work on Monday
Dogs, parrots, cats.
Eh, I wish I could jump straight to Saturday,
And I would stay there for the rest of my life.

But here I go, growling like a fierce tiger,
I'm tearing up the papers and want to go home...
I suddenly want a miracle, and at this very moment,
May Monday become a day off!

The designer smells like a new computer,
The work often smells like crap.
Smells like a customer, smells like money,
It smells like breadboards and...pies.

It often smells like lack of time.
Insufficient sleep, stupid bosses.
It smells like outdoors and souvenirs,
The coffee has cooled down from the hole in the bagel.

In the morning it smells almost creative.
In the evening he often smells like beer.
During the day, during breaks, tobacco smoke,
A creative and healthy lifestyle.

With blurred vision and inaccurate hearing,
It smells like late night work and urgency.
Pakhent, at times, with capital vodka...
It just doesn’t smell like personal life.

I love working since childhood -
I'm in a hurry to brag to you.
Beautiful women please
And, like a combine harvester, I plow on them.

Having plowed, I sow abundantly -
It was not in vain that I worked.
I put on my pants and run away -
Until my husband found us.

I continue to plow at home -
I’m also not lazy with my wife.
This is how I work, I flutter,
Like a bee, every single day.

Sometimes the thought comes to me -
What about the pension fund?
I plow, straining my back,
And I increase the gene pool.

And I don’t get a bonus for this,
They don't charge a single ruble.
They said there is no bet,
You worked, uncle, apparently in vain.

I am to many women in Russia,
Helped to disrupt maternity capital.
Yes, I'm certainly not the Messiah -
But I believe that I didn’t plow in vain.

A vacancy opened up at work.
The HR department sent a sheaf of papers, -
Profiles of applicants. Virgos, aunts...
I set about raking them, somehow.

I’ll give you a short digest of those summaries:
In the column about shortcomings: “My husband left me.”
About hobbies: “Sauna, dacha, garden beds,
And choral singing too..."

Responsibilities: "Casting the client"
Education: “Massage courses.”
And on “benefit to the company” - arguments
Banditry is worse than blackmail...

My view during this screening process
Suddenly I was struck by an uncharacteristic line:
“I am reliable,” wrote the maiden
In column o weaknesses their...

My colleagues and I laughed, of course.
And they decided to take her into the team.
It works flawlessly for two months.
Looks like there are no alternatives...

Asphalt fabric in red leaves
It gets limp in the rain.
To work at a small trot
I'm in a hurry, leaving home,

Where is the cozy bed?
A purring cat, a warm blanket...
I want, I want back
But there is no turning back.

Seductive, of course
The smell of coffee and a robe...
Only us, ordinary pawns,
Not put back.

I love my job! I'll come here on Saturday
And of course Sunday. This is where I will celebrate my birthday
New Year, March 8. I'll spend the night here tomorrow.
A raincoat, a tent, a bag - your spouse will be shocked!
If I don’t get sick, I don’t lose my temper, I don’t go wild,
Here I will meet all sunrises, all sunsets and greetings!
The horses are dying from work. Well, I am an immortal pony!!!

Someone is chasing the tram
And passers-by laugh after him:
"Look at the idiot,
Your face will crack on the rails!”
Passengers laugh too:
“It won’t catch up, even if you coat it with pepper!”
And in response he wheezes - “I have to!”
I am the driver of your tram!!!”

In production, no matter how bitter it may be,
Problems cannot be solved without sex -
Today the boss is at the morning planning meeting
He demanded dedication from us...
And I confess honestly to you guys,
I did everything this way and not otherwise -
Wage growth curve
She accelerated it with her dedication.

If you love hard work,
A chair, a bed are not held in high esteem,
Then understand, the advice is not stupid, -
At least take some rest at work.

Five minutes of break left.
And then - plow the shift again!
I was so yearning for rest,
What culturally cannot be conveyed!

People are on vacation. I envy them.
White envy is black sadness.
I cultivate patience in myself.
I can't wait to see the results of my efforts!

Oh, work, work, work!
I love you. I love it very much!
Would you mind adding a hundred to my salary?
I'll make a carload of dumplings!

My husband loves to eat well.
It’s hard for me to feed him!
Only you can listen to me.
Help me live differently.

I'm talking to work now.
Wow... Cool layout!
I'd better go have a hearty lunch.
True, the husband will not be happy about this.

He loves to eat madly.
I also love to eat.
The husband acts very smartly,
Respecting my diet...

“Boss”, “chief” - wonderful words!
And may they cause migraines and indigestion,
But we look at you with reverence,
You are the brain and head of our company!

My friend, don't knock with your fist,
Throwing at us a familiar tirade:
“Like, ignoramuses! Like, we are bad at everything!
Like, we need to think more about work..."

After all, we already, without demanding rewards,
From morning to night, tirelessly,
And sometimes forgetting about family,
We work for you... And the result?

For what?! What a terrible retribution for:
Increase and salary cut?!
And the working day is harder and longer,
And you, oh our leader, are getting angrier every day...

Comrades! Perhaps there is a potion,
To calm down the tyrant boss...

I choked, but now everything is fine.
How can I work when I’m depressed?
Oh, you see, it’s raining outside the window!
And the umbrella has been acting up for a long time.

Came to work gloomy and angry
And spread like jam all over the chair
Completely disabled
At least go apply for disability
Eh, leave me alone, why can’t you sleep?
I don't know how I got caught?
Today I’m not just working,
I can't do crap!
And you don’t have to ask, just come in
I don't want to go anywhere.
You better tell me thank you
That I sit quietly and remain silent!
What are you grazing at the monitor? Aren’t you ashamed?
Yes, I read jokes all day
Is it really not visible to me, damn it -
I won't work today
I am a ready client of a mental hospital
And don't make me mad, it's dangerous!
If suddenly something happens to the Internet,
I'll probably glue my fins right here
In general, if you are not a terminator,
If your nerves are not steel,
Mondays are your pay
Here's to a fun weekend!

I argued with my boss for two hours
He showed his vile nature.
We disagreed on all issues
In the end he realized he was wrong.
He told him: “You are the enemy of progress.”
Please listen to others!
It’s a pity, it’s in Russian - not a big deal,
And I am a complete zero in English.

I'm standing at the bus stop. I'm waiting for transport.
When will someone arrive?
I'm happy to go to work.
Colleagues will not notice that joy.

They don't know anything yet
About how I'm going to quit.
I found one where the salary was - oh-ho-ho!
And I don’t mind parting with this one.

I'm worried like a child, I can't!
Eat, perhaps, a kilogram of something sweet?
New job, I’ll come running to you,
Running away from the old one without looking back!

I agree - and don’t pay in the future,
Let him stagger me as I go,
Don't give me shelter, don't feed me,
I'll still come to work.
Pay day - no mourning date,
It's just not there this year
Don't give rations and wages,
I'll still come to work.
I will never go on vacation,
I meant this sea
Empty tea and crackers for lunch,
I'll still come to work.
And I don’t need treatment at all,
They can cure you suddenly, unfortunately,
No rewards needed
I'll still come to work.
It’s okay that the clothes are in patches,
I'm not lying to you, keep in mind
Even if the travel is paid,
I'll still come to work.
I will come even if there is an eclipse
Even if the boss is Judas,
Even if the brain is cloudy,
I WILL COME! BUT I WILL NOT WORK!!!

Stay at work
And play digger all night
And, looking at you, the customer
The deadline will be postponed.

If your favorite kettle
The tee has no socket,
That's for this crime
We must strictly punish

And with an unwavering hand
Unplug the server from the socket,
So that everyone around you will know
It's time to drink tea.

If suddenly your car
Doesn't work as it should
You're on the motherboard
Hit your fist hard.

If it doesn't help, hit it with a sledgehammer,
Kick the monitor...
You will then explain to your superiors:
“She started it first!”

If suddenly on your hard drive
An evil virus has leaked
Don't treat him with Lozinsky -
The virus also wants to live!

Infected programs
Scatter it on BBSs,
And you, your colleagues
Will be remembered often.

If your colleagues
They gave me a big bonus
And they completely forgot about you
And they didn’t give any

Instead of paint, pour it into the printer
Strawberry jam,
And about you in the institution
They will never forget!

Writing poetry is not a dusty job:
Look out the window or go outside -
And, having wound myself up half a turn,
Lines about the sun, stars and moon.
No strong muscles, no pouring sweat,
Just a little bit of guile - you're already on horseback.
For example, about banal yellowness
You will say: “The late leaves are gilded.”
Graceful style, the art of fluent edits,
A little practice and that's the skill.
Basically anyone can do this.
But if this work is such a small thing -
Where does this happiness and fatigue come from?
And angry dissatisfaction with yourself?

Hello work! How are you?
Tell me, aren’t you tired of it yet?
Save your salary for me,
And I will do the job properly!
I will not fail! I appreciate our union!
I also appreciate having you!
But that means it’s like this... Wake it up:
Work, remember... You are only mine!
I am selfish, possessive, I know
But accept me as I am!
Otherwise I’ll quit right away, dear!
This is how we, women, have revenge!
Don’t lead to revenge, I beg you!
I'm used to you, like my own sister!
I simply adore you, your work!
Please don't give me away to someone else!
I won't leave, believe my word!
But you must raise your salary!
I am ready to work day and night!
Work, but also be faithful to me!
I love the faithful. It's not about men!
They are not an ATM or a wallet!
Man was created for woman's body.
And for the soul... Did you get the hint?

We are not afraid of work,
We don't run away from work.
There is no work - we go to bed,
There is work... then we sleep.

Oh boss, you are mighty
You are chasing flocks of clouds,
You force me to do it on Saturday too
Show us off to work.
Al will you refuse me an answer?
Have you seen anywhere in the world
Are you an annual salary?
I'm looking for her...
- Wait, there is a mountain in the north,
There is a deep hole in it,
In that hole on three ropes
The coffin swings from gold.
Your SALARY is in that coffin!!!

Monday morning
I'm always waiting for something.
I'm waiting for something unearthly,
I'm waiting for something beautiful like this.

So that it looks delicious,
So that I don't feel sad,
To be warm,
So that with a smile forever.

So that it's not food,
She was kind, not evil.
So where can I get this?
We have to rack our brains!

And she came to me in the morning,
I brought a box of sadness.
With hair and big,
Scary and businesslike.

In bright rhinestones and furs
And with thorns in his ears.
Fear brings, cools,
He harnesses everyone into a collar.

Everyone here is scared, everyone is silent,
Scared all the kittens away.
Someone suddenly shouted from the corner:
“Hide everyone, WORK is in progress!”

Two questions came up:
From what? And why?
As always, after lunch,
Do you want to sleep at work?

I immediately gave two answers
My mind is nimble and complex.
I'm an unusual guy,
Smart, fast, groovy,

Maybe in my delicious soup
They threw sleeping pills at me,
Or maybe something else
They mixed it into my salad

They want to put me to sleep
They feed, sing, put to sleep,
It's clear that I'm not simple,
They want to eat me all up

Well, maybe not eat it,
But all this is not good,
Every time after eating,
I'm falling asleep, I want to sleep,

Well, what if they want me
Put to sleep at work,
And then while I'm sleeping,
Kicking me in the face

Or not to hit, but still,
I feel this is not good
And probably earlier
I'll run away from work.

Yesterday I had an interview,
I amazed the director with my intelligence!
Having said hello, he remarked as a reward -
You are so smart! Why You Need It?

I love work, I love salary!
I catch myself doing this more and more
I also love the Boss, he is better than others!
And Boss Boss and everyone else.

I love my Office, its location,
And I feel disgusted with vacation!
I love my furniture, damp and gray
Pieces of paper in which I believe in God...

I love my chair, in the Cell without light,
And there is no more beloved object in the world...
I love my equals
Their cunning glances, ridicule, mockery.

My glorious Display and Computer I personally
I kiss you furtively, even though they don’t care.
And every Chela again and again,
I struggle to understand from time to time.

I'm happy to be here and I'm not weak yet
Favorite work - the happiest Slave
I love standards and deadlines for work
I love meetings - even though I fall asleep there

I love my job - I’ll say it without any fuss
And these smart people all in white
Those who came to visit me today
With the desire to place me somewhere.....

Forgive me, my job
For my irresponsibility!
Someone stole my heart.
Because of him I don’t sleep at night!

I will repair the iron
I'll hang up the curtain in a moment.
I will install a wall hook,
And I'll post the picture.
I'll paint the floor and ceiling
I'll clean the pipes in the bathroom.
And I'll put another lock on the door,
I will let down uninvited guests.
I'll give my ex a black eye,
I can easily drink away my pay.
I'll start a quarrel and a scandal,
Plus I'll give my neighbors a beating.
I'll arrange a carnival at night,
I will cover you with caustic abuse.
I’ll fight with poetry on the spot...
And I’ll sleep... With a neighbor.

Despite the rain, bad weather...
Despite the diarrhea and cold...
I'll still crawl to work...
I’ll crawl, but I won’t work...

If a couple of billions were suddenly lost in the report -
It's not a problem at all to waste your time:
Collect the numbers in a pile, as if there was no sadness -
And hand over calmly - let the boss look for it himself!

That's it, we're tired... Let's face it - we urgently need to leave
You will certainly be released - after all, there are no prohibitions for you:
Explain - it’s better, deputy, that you’re going to study
And it doesn’t matter that billiards doesn’t matter, “learning is light”!

If suddenly, over the speakerphone, they want you straight to the boss
And they don’t just want it - but, right now, on the carpet
Explain that you are “absent” to all your teammates
The boss will cool down, and his colleagues will think: “Well, he’s cunning!”

Tired of waiting at the door to get your paper endorsed?
Draw the signature yourself, more carefully than the boss.
He will appreciate your courage, impatience, courage:
Maybe he himself will ask for something - after all, this is “not a question for you!”?

Do you have a task - to “keep the client on the phone”?
Don't worry - he may be annoyed, bored, waiting...
Sing a song... an anecdote about a boss-patron
If he gets through again, he will specifically call you!

Too early for work - don't feel like getting up?
Calm down, everything is fine: continue to sleep peacefully!
The later you start appearing in the office
The more cordially your colleagues will greet you in the morning!

If you have nothing to do, and it’s siesta outside -
Bring a TV, a chair, an umbrella - and go
Before entering work, stake out a place in the morning -
And rest easy: no one will find you here!

If someone comes to you on business - even someone very important -
You kick him in the face so as not to spoil the break!
And do the work - so everyone will start asking
Without any limit, burying you in business!!!

I've been a fortune teller for a long time. I'm filming! I'll spoil it!
I'm brewing a love spell for everyone.
I’ll quickly make an all-knowing face
For those suckers who come with a request.
I take it inexpensively, in rubles and foreign currency.
(Don’t come to me without a wad of dollars!)
Who thinks this is very cool,
Go to hell - there is someone to fool...

If everyone is in the office at once,
Sick of a terrible flu
And work immediately stopped,
And customers are calling!
You, with any piece of paper,
Come to them when they are sick,
Let them get sick too
There will be no one to call!

What are you sad about, poor janitor,
Rainy morning times?
Don't sweep, beloved yard,
Don't argue with the kids.
The attic is cracking, my hands are shaking
And there is a secret sadness in the heart,
When Toyotas and Suzukis
They fly through the puddles into the distance.
What are the scores between you?
Of course, you will forgive them everything.
Just spit on the wing of Toyota
And at least get a little revenge.

I’m sitting in my office in a damp warehouse,
Tired dirty faces all around.
The shelves are bristling with various irons -
They have spare parts like pine cones on a Christmas tree.

The passages wind like animal paths,
Dirty movers walk around in droves.
They jump on the shelves like monkeys
Laziness of the day warehouse boys.

Some people don't really want to work,
Someone seems to have been bitten in the ass,
Briskly scurries through the labyrinths of the warehouse.
The warehouse manager walks like an important bear...

There are hyenas, jackals and wolves here -
I hide cowardly behind the distant shelves.
To our kettle for coffee
Everyone comes running together early sometimes.

And how to go to the zoo every day for work
Dreaming of living until next Saturday...

Asphalt fabric in red leaves
It gets limp in the rain.
To work at a small trot
I'm in a hurry, leaving home,
Where is the cozy bed?
Purring cat, warm blanket...
I want, I want back
But there is no turning back.
Seductive, of course
The smell of coffee and a robe...
Only us, ordinary pawns,
Not put back.

Everyone will come to work on Monday,
Let's tell you what you did, who you buzzed with,
And I'm so cool on Sunday and Saturday
So cool, free, just sitting at home!

Day always follows night.
Days have flown by.
We've aged a day
Who can help with this?

Tomorrow will be a new day.
There will be sun, there will be shade...
You can even do something...
Just doing something is lazy.

Who is to blame for this?
Why am I not happy to work?
...Obviously this is a school,
And perhaps a kindergarten.

I don't want to work.
Maybe I need to see a doctor?..
Let him give a cure for laziness...
Just how will I pay?

I'll stick my tongue out at him
He's not used to this.
Maybe the doctor will smile?
He will say: “nice mischief maker.”

There is grace in the world...
Just where to look for it;
So that you don't have to work,
But to receive money.

...No, I want to work.
I'm just kidding like that.
Maybe someone will smile?
...I keep silent, silent, silent!

All specialties have a special smell:
The geneticist smells like a buccal scraping.
Surgeons smell like peritonitis,
And pulmonologists smell of pleurisy.

The forensic medic smells like a grave.
Nachmed smells like cognac and tequila.
Evil old ladies, a ton of paper
Our poor doctors smell.

The mammologist smells like a dirty armpit.
And pediatricians smell like plant matter.
There are a lot of smells, but there is also a bummer -
Only the dentist smells like BUBBLE!

I'm looking for a job. I need it without sweating
To the car right under the gate
So that you don't want to go out
In addition, at work so that there is
Furnishings from the best fashion designers
I still want it, although it’s really not clever
Two cute obedient secretaries
Running on command: “March bunnies!”
Torment the keyboard with your fingers
Catching what I wanted to say.
From the windows the direction is towards dawn
My worker would have an office.
And a sauna with a huge jacuzzi
For erotic and fiery discussions.
Yes, not fill with water, but with wine...
Steamed lobsters in milk
I’ll start creating impromptu and reviews...
…It’s a pity there is no license for such work.

I love working since childhood -
I'm in a hurry to brag to you.
I please beautiful women
And, like a combine harvester, I plow on them.
Having plowed, I sow abundantly -
It was not in vain that I worked.
I put on my pants and run away -
Until my husband found us.
I continue to plow at home -
I’m also not lazy with my wife.
This is how I work, I flutter,
Like a bee, every single day.
Sometimes the thought comes to me -
What about the pension fund?
I plow, straining my back,
And I increase the gene pool.
And I don’t get a bonus for this,
They don't charge a single ruble.
They said there is no bet,
You worked, uncle, apparently in vain.
I am to many women in Russia,
Helped to disrupt maternity capital.
Yes, I'm certainly not the Messiah -
But I believe that I didn’t work in vain.

I'm not afraid of work
But for now I’m homeless.
I'm in no hurry to be a slave
The authorities are bourgeois!

I feel bad on Monday, just terrible!
The worst day of the whole week.
Like a snake, I make jokes through my teeth,
And all the thoughts in my head are askew.

Birds fly above me,
Bugs and bugs are buzzing around...
Wow! Shoo, - I'll take you! Sparrows, titmice!
And the kids are running around and screaming!

No need to go to work on Monday
Dogs, parrots, cats.
Eh, I wish I could jump straight to Saturday,
And I would stay there for the rest of my life.

But here I go, growling like a fierce tiger,
I'm tearing up the papers and want to go home...
I suddenly want a miracle, and at this very moment,
May Monday become a day off!